It’s not always wise to believe what you hear from other people. Sometimes stories are made up and are not true.
Here are some examples:
You heard: Only girls get raped.
The truth: Boys can get raped too!
You heard: It’s not rape if it’s your boyfriend or girlfriend.
The truth: Most rapes are done by someone you know. No one has the right to rape you.
You heard: But we had been together before.
The truth: You can say no, even if you have had sex with that person before.
You heard: It’s not fair if we were in the middle of sex and she says no. That’s not rape.
The truth: It can be difficult to stop when you are in the middle of things, but if your partner asks you to stop at any time always respect that request. If you force it, it’s rape.
You heard: She was asking for it (sex) wearing such short, sexy clothes.
The truth: Wearing sexy clothes does not mean a girl wants to have sex. Nor does kissing or flirting.
You heard: It was sex, not rape.
The truth: If a boy forces himself on a girl after she has said no, or while she is passed out from drugs or alcohol, he is raping her -- they are not having sex! The same applies if a girl forces a boy into sex.
You heard: If they don’t say no – it’s okay.
The truth: If you are trying to get sexual with someone and they are pushing you away, drunk, passed out or trying to get you to stop, but you still carry on, it is rape. Just because they didn’t say the word ‘No!’ doesn’t mean that they wanted to have sex.
You heard: Some people lie about rape to explain why they are not virgins.
The truth: Many people tell lies, and not just about rape. If someone reports a rape, it’s important to take it seriously and investigate it before assuming they are lying.
Have you been sexually assaulted or raped? Has someone you know? Visit the nearest health facility, police station and SWAAGAA. HEY! Always report any form of abuse or tell an adult that you trust each time the abuse happens. Plan to get out the situation as soon as possible. You can report the person to the police, call 999, call 95 the SWAGAA helpline and 9664 childline at The Ministry of Education and Training.
Read what to do next below.
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5 comments Log in to commentMiyanda31
.......continuation I thought i would faint. I couldn't sleep . Thinking he would come and rape me. I told my best friend this. I couldn't and still haven't told my aunt. Because it still surprises me. Think of an angel and you'd get to know how my family members regard him. You know if i told my aunts they would laugh, like really laugh. So i wonder whether if he actually raped me, whether i would have reported it. Whether i would handle the uncertain look in my aunts eye's asking me if i'm sure, the way you'd ask a kid if he/she is sure of wanting to wear underwear only to church in a stormy weather. I guess we'll never know.
5 years, 4 months Ago Report0 Reply
Miyanda31
You know it's easy to encourage victims to seek help and report abuse. I have heard a lot of rape stories. But the most one's that i have not heard are those which aren't told. Sometimes it is difficult to talk about such issues to those close to you because you don't know their views, more especially if that person is a super close relative. It is not easy. I had, no, i have an uncle and i was staying in the house with him and his kids. I was living there for the last week before schools closed as it was closer and my aunt(her husband) was at Ezulwini to prepare for my mothers funeral. So, one night i'm preparing a meal for us. He is drunk and he starts telling me he loves me. Whether i know that and it was odd. I have lived with him for 3 yrs. He is kind, patient, giving. I could say more. This is a great person, I respect and look up to. So, hearing that threw me offguard. Ofcourse , it felt like he would say he was joking and that would be that. But he didn't. I fetl uncomfortable. The space between us was too close. He left to drink again and i felt my heart pumping out of my chest.
5 years, 4 months Ago ReportRecent Replies
Tune Me Moderator
Dear user that is a wired situation, that really need attention. It is true you can feel like it is not good to report it , but you really need someone to talk to, someone you trust.
5 years, 3 months AgoMiyanda31
What will someone I 'trust'do? How will they help? Will they make it go away. Those who should be the ones who know, my family, if told will not believe. It's just the way it is.
5 years, 3 months Ago Report